Reasons why I love Clifton's Cafeteria, even though the food is terrible.

I just found this post I wrote October 19, 2009. I don't know why I never published it. Perhaps, I knew subconsciously Clifton's would one day change and I would have to not so much defend it's honor but remind you of what it once was.

1. "Clifton's" is a portmanteau of Clifford Clinton. I love portmanteaus.
2. All the really good fonts.
3. The fancy floor outside the entry. Macadamed maybe? I don't remember the correct descriptor. (But today, September 26, 2010, I do: it's terrazzo).
4. It's Huell Howser approved.
5. The fake bears make me nostalgic for The Country Bear Jamboree, which Disneyland should never have removed--or made a movie about.
6. The variety of antlers available for viewing in quite some random places.
7. The gang of Bible Crusaders in orange shirts using the second floor as it's pamphlet-folding headquarters.
8. The creepy mini-chapel that talks to you when you push a button.
9. It's pretty cheap to eat there (but not this good).
10. OMG FLOCKED WALLPAPER.

Hey Glow,

Why don't you let people actually ride the carousel?!

Laura

P.S. Infrared-scanning of the audience/other audience-based art does not a good art piece make.

Dear Apple,

"Learning" is not an adjective. Get your parallel structure act together!!

Only looking out for you,
Laura

Good news, we escaped the No Country for Old Men Herman Munster Cowboy Hallway Creeper!

I've liked Ferraby Lionheart's music in some form or another for maybe close to a decade, but tonight's show was really super spectacular. Way better than anything he's recorded. Big sound! Thanks to some of Leslie & the Badgers and some others as his backing band. Really, really swell. oh, hey, the show was free! His new album comes out tomorrow, but, sadly, it's not this sequined-suit-wearing sound that I want it to be.

P.S. There was prestidigitation (!) involved. Legerdemain/prestidigitation--which is a better word? Tough decision.

bah.

Psychoanalysis of Talking Heads
Flags! I got all of them except Lebanon.
Pothole gardens! Awesome!

I wore a hat for a long time today. But I've also not worn a hat for the past couple hours. My head still feels like it's wearing a hat. This is very strange.

Also,

I was doing some math while I was waiting for my friend to get her book signed. Anthony Bourdain's going to be 70 when his daughter is 20.

In case you were wondering...

DSC05693
Originally uploaded by neonspecs

who would win in a knife fight between Giada de Laurentiis and Nigela Lawson, Anthony Bourdain (pictured in the super blurry picture above) is pretty sure about Nigela taking it.

King Wimp

I've been cleaning out my purse again and found a receipt on which I scrawled "to have and have not Rex Wimpy." After some quick googling, I now know that Rex Wimpy did the special effects cinematography for many films including one of my favorites, To Have and Have Not, with Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall (I believe that's the film on which they first met). Anyways, what a silly name, Rex (King) Wimpy!

Holsum

Holsum
Originally uploaded by neonspecs

This is one of my favorite signs in Las Vegas currently lit, which I guess is saying a lot because there are tons o' signs in that town. Of note is the apparent need to shorten Italiano with an apostrophe, getting rid of only one letter but a whole syllable.

According to a pretty fantastic campaign from 1910, home-made bread is slavery! See more at the grand Daily Mirror blog (not connected to the UK tabloid).

I always joke that a lot of today's fashion is clothing my grandmother would wear. Here, in fact, is a jacket my grandmother actually owns and wears all the time. Strange.

I saw Fred Armisen at the Silverlake Jubilee this past weekend.
1. I was surprised I remembered his name, considering I rarely watch SNL, because it is terrible.
2. Why is he in LA?
3. After reading the Wikipedia article on him, he plays drums on a Les Savy Fav album. What?!

Anyways, he lost out, though, 'cause he left before The Living Sisters even started. Loser.

I really, really want a Mr. Jones Watch.

After the glow, the scene, the stage, the set

I saw Pavement this past Thursday night in Pomona and it was definitely magical, that is until we were stranded on the side of a freeway, but I'll get to that later. Most important information on that evening is that they played five out of my top seven pavement songs:

1. Spit on a Stranger
2. Roll with the Wind
3. Shady Lane
4. Cut Your Hair
5. Range Life
6. Harness Your Hopes
7. Stereo

I'm pretty satisfied with that outcome, as the italicized ones are B-sides I probably should never have hoped them to play (but can we just all agree that Roll with the Wind is spectacular?).

So then my friend's car has some sort of issue, in which the car fills with smoke and loses power breaking capability. Let me tell you, that is some scary stuff. And then we stand, freezing, on the side of a freeway in the middle of the night waiting for a tow truck. I obviously did not envision this occasion in choosing to wear a dress that morning. It's a good thing everyone bought shirts at the show; wearing three shirts did help a little. This situation would probably have been less frightening had I not watched so many Law & Orders and or film noirs that include scenes similar to these.

All in all, however, it was a pretty successful Nochella weekend: Pavement, first day of new job, long shift at old job (money!), Record Store Day (including buying a Robyn Hitchcock album I somehow missed which has a song titled "Raymond Chandler Evening"--what could be more perfect?!), pizzza I hadn't had in 14 years, square dance, maybe the best donuts in L.A., and learning how to make bagels.

Listomania

Awesome. Louis Armstrong.
Buy me this book please.
I now know what a pot walloper is.
Nancy Pelosi, the Anna Wintour of Congress!
"Bank Failures Strike a Blow to City's Art"
DO clap between movements!
Y'all know how much I love maps. Here's an interesting one. All of USA could fit into New Hampshire!
The Yet-But

Zombie!

Me and Sahr from Fela dancing from Terry Richardson on Vimeo.

Duck tape or duct tape? Is there a difference?

Y'all know how much I love the L.A. River. WSJ discusses the Pasadena Museum of Art's current exhibit (Lillian, we still have to go!)

Can freeways have character? Do they deserve to be preserved?

Pretender, contender, or defender? I don't like any of them.

In other news, I encountered one of the kids from that newish Parenthood show at Royce last week, and she was not cool. As I guess I sorta expected. The show was alright but now I'll just think about her ridiculous eye rolling and expectation of preferential treatment.

Caspar Milquetoast

To start out the 2010 book list, I just finished Webster Unabridged, a compendium of comic panes and strips by H.T. Webster, published in 1945. The humor is SO outdated, which is humorous in itself. It's so America 1940s. I checked this book out of the library, however, because of Caspar Milquetoast. 

Some of you long-time readers of this blog, if you exist, may remember the blog subtitle: "It always comes back to David Niven." I had to take that down because it hadn't been coming back to him in a while (Although the title and url both stem from Niven film Around the World in 80 Days (1954)). Well, now it has! I first heard the word milquetoast when I professed my love of David Niven to my mother. She responded: "That milquetoast?!" His foppish top hat and umbrella cane probably irked my mother, while these accessories are probably what I liked best about him. Consequently, I began to associate the term with formal, serious people. 

In case you don't know, it actually means timid or bland. And it is purely an American word, appearing in American English dictionaries but not British English ones. So, it turns out my mother's description of Niven, the ultimate Brit, was not quite ironic, but whatever is the appropriate term here, coincidentally incorrect? The word comes from the aforementioned character in H.T. Webster's series of The Timid Soul single-pane comics. In turn, he got the name from milk toast, a food often eaten at the time by people with ill or sensitive stomachs, a calming, mild food. Caspar is always afraid, worried, and meek (Check out the page I scanned in for you). Exactly what David Niven isn't. 

A more appropriate character would be Mr. Limpet of the children's classic, The Incredible Mr. Limpet. Don Knotts! Such a great movie. (Edit: I was spot on. I just checked Netflix and they even describe him as "a bespectacled, milquetoast bookkeeper.")

Anyways, the book linked in the list is not this book, because Amazon doesn't carry it, but a similar looking collection and one that is only 50 cents! You should definitely get it or find one at your library.

It's that time again.

 

It's "mistakes" like these that make Thom Andersen mad. 

Removing the 2008 Edition to make room for the 2010 Edition. 2008 was either a year I actually read a lot or I actually remember to at least list them here. Of course, I highly recommend all Chandler, but my favorite is still The Long Goodbye. Read it, stat! Also, the L.A. River book is really illuminating. Y'all know how much I love the L.A. River. (Everytime I write LA now, since watching Los Angeles Plays Itself, I feel a pang of guilt and have to put in the periods).

Books I Read: 2008 Edition

• Blake Gumprecht - The Los Angeles River: Its Life, Death, and Possible Rebirth
• Edna Bonacich & Jake B. Wilson - Getting the Goods: Ports, Labor, and the Logistics Revolution
• Edward Thorpe - Chandlertown
• Elizabeth Ward & Alain Silver - Raymond Chandler's Los Angeles
• Gordon G. Whitney - From Coastal Wilderness to Fruited Plan: A History of Environmental Change in Temperate North America from 1500 to Present
• K. Bruce Newbold - Six Billion Plus: World Population in the Twenty-First Century
• Massimo Livi-Bacci - A Concise History of World Population
• Philip Durham - Down These Mean Streats a Man Must Go: Raymond Chandler's Knight
• Raymond Chandler & Robert B. Parker - Poodle Springs
• Raymond Chandler - Farewell, My Lovely
• Raymond Chandler - Little Sister
• Raymond Chandler - The High Window
• Raymond Chandler - The Lady in the Lake
• Raymond Chandler - The Long Goodbye
• Raymond Chandler - Trouble is My Business
• Ruth Wilson Gilmore - Golden Gulag
• Stephen Ambrose - Undaunted Courage: Meriwether Lewis, Thomas Jefferson, and the Opening of the American West
• The Imagineers - Walt Disney Imagineering: A Behind the Dreams Look at Making the Magic Real

Subtitle Award of the Week

Sundance Channel, from French:

"You see how beautiful the models are? Well, beautiful in inverted commas."

Yessss, inverted commas. So great.

Evolution of the Telephone.

Thank you, State Library of New South Wales.

"Big chunky phone because you need a big serious phone for the world war. You can't be texting about the Third Reich. You cant be sayin' 'Hitler just invaded the Sudetenland omg omg'" - Craig Ferguson

If there is an adjective I really hate, it's "directional." What kind of useless word is that? Ummm, it's going in a direction? Yes, I know in fashion it is supposed to mean "pointing toward the future," but it is stupid and silly, and its usage should cease promptly.

Dear Silverlake Lounge,

Your reasonably priced $6 gimlet surprises me. 1) It is a real gimlet! Made with gin! and Rose's Lime Juice! and that's it! 2) It tastes good. So shocking.

I commend you,
Laura

I saw Warren Christopher at the mall on Thursday and he was super adorable, although I feel like that may be an inappropriate way to describe a man who was not so long ago the United States Secretary of State. Anyways, he is super adorable and immaculately dressed. A man with much panache.

In other celebrity news (Warren Christopher is a celebrity, right?), Leonard Nimoy went to see Patti Smith at the Hammer and I got really excited about this. Eric McCormack (Will, really, he won't ever be able to be anything else) went to hear Neil Gaiman at Royce, and so did Eric J. Lawrence, your Local Public Radio Music Librarian (KCRW, at which I volunteered this morn, takin' your moneyyyyy) [If you happen to read this and it weirds you out that I am reporting this and increasing your celebrity to my four, maybe five loyal readers, EJL, let me know and I will delete it].

Finally, as also a member of KCET (yeah, look at me, your unemployed friend so liberally donating her time and money [I want to use the word "largesse" but can't figure out how]), I attended a "gala" at the California Science Center and California African American Museum with Tavis Smiley (whom Greg hates for reasons unbeknownst to me). I actually like Smiley a little less after I heard him speak this evening. He just seemed so not happy to be there, plus he complained about a lack of appreciation for culture in Los Angeles, which was just annoying. Eh, but the food was great (Creole, Jamaican, Ethiopian, and something else), and a few of the exhibits were nice. I especially recommend "Harlem of the West: Jazz, Bebop, and Beatnik" at CAAM and the awesome paintings/carvings of musicians that are from the walls of an old jazz club in Texas, of all places (Jake Morrow, you don't read my blog, but you should go check out this exhibition to see the section of Harry Smith. Hurry, it closes soon!). Smiley's America I Am at the Science Center was whatever. It's probably great if it's been a while since you were in high school or if your school was racist. It's never bad to be reminded of the things covered in the exhibition but it wasn't mind-blowing or anything like that.

As a result of this post, I looked up the origin of "panache." Wikipedia says it was once a marker of character worthy of suspect, until Cyrano de Bergerac. Literally, it means plume. FYI.

Sometimes I really want to buy something from eBay, but then I just can't because the seller includes prayers and random apostrophes in the description. This is quite unfortunate.

Dear Facebook readers,

You may have noticed, if you are reading this on Facebook, that in my last post all the movies were missing. That is because you aren't reading it on blogspot. So get to it, folks, and see this blog in all it's unemployment-time-filling splendor. http://followthatostrich.blogspot.com

Laura

I watched 149 movies in 2009.

What follows is a list of my top films from each month. This took me several hours to make. Complete waste of time, but I didn't realize it was going to take so long until about an hour into it and then it was too late. I had already started! Apparently, I don't like current movies. Only ten of these did I see in theaters or, in the case of PBS documentaries, when they debuted on PBS.

January:


February: I only watched one movie in February and it wasn't amazing.

March:


April:


May:


June:


July (this may have been the best month of my movie-viewing. so many to list!):


August:


September:


October:


November:


December:

Updated: Who I want to be when I grow up.

1. Huell Howser's assistant/successor.
   
2. Tambourine player in The Parson Redheads.
3. A guest on Sesame Street.
   

here, here Paul Smith

"Unfortunately, it’s just so normal now for people not to believe anything and for people to lie about things, and gamble on them, and not be sincere. In a way, sincerity is the new fake because no one even believes you if you are sincere."

With chains and knives!

Roland Reiner Tiango. awesome awesome awesome. check out his stuff.

"Whoomp (Sqaure It Is)" is a terrifying thought.
Paul Rand!!!
Wes Andersen seems to be less annoying and more adorable in animation. Perhaps this is a reason.
"Indie wasn't crappy for a purpose (anymore)"
Do you have some extra old guns and knives lying around?

(bonus points to anyone who knows what the title of this point is referencing)

John Krasinski reminds me a lot of Andy Griffith these days.

Two things that would prevent me from buying a watch.

1. No hour demarcation of any kind.
2. This slogan: "German precision and American testosterone."

Dear Wes Anderson,

I like you. Then I don't. I like you. Then I don't. You're making this really tough for me. But right now, I like you.

Laura

More articles.

Christmas song Jews.
White House vegetables not actually White House vegetables.
History of Christmas cards, sorta.
Super interesting article on Highland Park Jews.

Dear iTunes,

Why is that whenever I play a song from a Greatest Hits compilation, you display Steve Miller Band album art, but when I play the one or two songs I have that are actually by Steve Miller Band, you show Crosby, Stills & Nash art?

HUH?
Laura

Dear fashion,

I may have already written about this, but it seems you are stealing my dreams. First, wingtips. Then, clogs. And, now, monocles. I'm not sure what to say about this. Before I was hesitant to buy these things because they were so expensive. Now that everyone wants them, they are much more accessible (well not quite yet for the monocles), but, at the same time, everyone has them.

What a conundrum!
Laura

Dear Wall Street Journal,

You use "according to a person familiar with their thinking" too much. Does this person even have any value?

I am not sure,
Laura

Chalom

Dear Boyle Heights,

Thank you so much for this.

Best,
Laura

Dear Crimean War,

Thank you for the cardigan sweater (and apparently also the balaklava, although I don't have much use for that). What other woolen items will you reward civilization?

A hearty thanks,
Laura

Interesting articles I read today.

Anthony Bourdain reflects on 2007.
Jonathan Gold was only freelancing? Crazy.
I'm sad I never went to the Southwest Museum.
Although it took me way more than 25 minutes to get through to my gate last week, this article makes a convincing argument for the "Israelification" of American airports.
The Offline American.

LAist uses my photos again: http://laist.com/2010/01/03/happy_90th_birthday_musso_franks.php?gallery0Pic=5#gallery

Dear Israel,

Your toilet paper embossed with hearts is novel, but let me introduce you to the concept of toilet seat covers.

Best,
Laura

Question which your answer will allow me to judge your character.

What are your top three Stevie Wonder songs?

Genius

Oh, how I love you, Eric Ripert

Dear huddled masses,

What about bodies of stagnant piped-in water makes you throw your hard-earned money away? I really can't understand. Is there some specific origin of this ridiculous custom I don't know?

Please educate me,
Laura

Add trying to sound like Bob Dylan when singing "Then I Kissed Her" to the list of weird things Phil Spector did.

(This way too long documentary series All You Need is Love made by a British man in the 70's is alright. Wouldn't like it if not for these great weird interviews. Most of the information seems a little inaccurate or already known to me, but most people would probably learn a lot of new stuff).

This post is mainly for Lillian.

The black boots I finally procured after buying and returning and buying and returning again (although thankfully I didn't pay anything near that price. The second pair I got in a different color (Mud on the site; I don't know why they won't let me link the correct picture):

Dear L.A. River Report with Ed Reyes,

I would be much more into you if you were not accompanied by monumentally dull music. This isn't a hotel television menu channel show. Too bad it sounds like one (okay, obviously, I'm already admitting a lot by saying I watch LACityView channel 35).

Laura

P.S. THE L.A. RIVER IS A RIVER. DON'T MOCK IT.

J.L.Curtis part II

She thinks I "may have a runway" in my future and should have majored in costume design. She gets this all from a jacket. Excellent.

Also part II of What/Who Ron Jarvis Thinks I Look Like Today (although this is actually in reference to Monday): Coco Chanel. I'll take it.

Harry Shearer was there, too.

Wes Anderson

If you have seen any Wes Anderson film, particularly The Darjeeling Limited, you have probably realized he likes to use his soundtrack to very heavy-handedly underscore every emotion he wants the audience to feel. Quite frequently, my reaction is "OKAY, WES, I GET IT."

I saw Fantastic Mr. Fox this evening. I wonder if Anderson has ever used any diegetic music. I doubt it. Nevertheless, it didn't bother me as much this time. Maybe because I love the Beach Boys. And "Heroes and Villains" is my favorite song.

Also, Mario Batali is one of the minor voices? Crazy.

I need this necklace.

Please, please, please. Channukah present?!?

Dear people who decide San Vicente and Fairfax is an acceptable place to block the intersection,

WHAT THE HELL?

Laura

P.S. When is it ever acceptable to block an intersection?

New segment: "What/who Ron Jarvis thinks I look like today"

Bobby Darin

when the shark bites?

Dear man, whose business card I have already lost, at bar ,

Your socks were great.

Indeed,
Laura

Jamie Lee Curtis likes bluegrass and my new hat

and John C. Reilly wanted to know if I was going to play him a mini glockenspiel solo.

I like buying socks too much for someone who wears flip flops almost every day.

Don't worry, I'm not buying either of these.

Dear clothiers,

After doing some research, it seems what I dislike is called sublimation printing. If I am wrong, please correct me. Whatever it may be called, I do not understand why it exists. Why would one want clothing with random white stretches of fabric? Is it supposed to look like the ink just couldn't be absorbed there? It's not like dye just misses portions of a dress. It also usually accompanies a disastrous Ed Hardy-esque pattern. This is confounding.

Please explain,
Laura

Some examples:

OMG UCLA PARKING I HATE YOU

After returning the portrait, the art thieves reclined

Did you know the Los Angeles Police Department has an Art Theft Detail? Did you know it is the only only full-time municipal art investigative unit in the United States? It's a good thing, too, considering how, as Greg Allen says, "Seriously, there is some great art in LA. Or at least there was, until it got JACKED."

One of the stolen pieces is one of Andy Warhol's portraits of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. According to the aforementioned Allen, eight were commissioned by the man who had one set of athletes' portraits stolen. I have my own picture somewhere of one that hangs in the UCLA Chancellor's Residence, on loan from the Hammer Museum (perhaps they got one of the 4/8 given away), but this one will have to do because I can't find it. I have no real opinion on Chancellor Block's wife other than that I really enjoy her statement to the Daily Bruin: "'I met Kareem at a UCLA event recently and I said, ‘Oh, I see you every day.'"

Dear blog readers,

Analytics tells me my most popular posts are ones with the least comments. What's going on?

Laura

I like to sleep with the window open and you keep the window closed.

L-R, T-B:
1) Paul McCartney: Give My Regards to Broad Street
2) Paul Simon: Hearts and Bones
3) Paul Simon: Still Crazy After All These Years
4) Peter Sellers: the Best of Sellers
5) Petula Clark: The World's Greatest International Hits!
6) The Police: Ghost in the Machine

1) Rhino Records 99 cents purchase, yeeeeah. But, this album is just whatever. It's a soundtrack of a movie I'd never heard of. I didn't even realize it was a soundtrack until writing this right now. The bizarre pictures all over the gatefold should have clued me in, but one never knows with these rock stars. (oh my that was so cheesy). Anyways, this has a lot of his already released tracks. So, basically, this is the kind of record I buy when I'm just record shoppin' quickly and the albums are 99 cents.

2) I don't remember where I got this record. I don't even remember ever listening to it. So, alas, all I can say is that it has really ugly album art.

3) A classic I took from the parents, which includes the classic that gave this post its title. I don't think anything bad could be said about this album. Well, actually, it could be said that it's super annoying that my dad starts singing "Still Crazy After All These Years" every time someone mentioned something related to many years or being crazy. But I'll overlook that. Why, you ask? The answer is easy if you take it logically (what's that too much? Probably only if you know that it comes from "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" -- track four). okay okay "YOU'RE KIND" IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS EVER>BIG DEAL!11!!!!1!!1 (the 1s are to denote to gkla the level of excitement here). If you want to listen to a super perfect duo of songs, you want to listen to this song and then "Heart of the Country" from Paul McCartney's solo album, Ram.

---NOTE---: There are a lot of records that have been procured since this picture was taken, but I'll save writing about them 'til I have pictures.

4) MAMSROC. This is a weird not 12" 33 1/3 LP but 10", which means that it comes from the time when only classical music and 'musical' music was given the 'privilege' of getting more shellac. I really like the Parlophone logo.

5) Also MAMSROC. and, also ORANGE VINYL. woooooo!!! Also includes the silly rework: "The Boy from Ipanema." I think it is one of these (thank you internet! google "petula clark orange"): "There are also numerous bootleg albums from Taiwan which have become quite collectable. These are generally inferior quality copies of her American or British hit albums on red, orange, green or yellow vinyl with poorly xeroxed art work." true, but the poorly xeroxed art work looks kinda nice.

6) Rhino Records $0.49 purchase from early high school. I liked this record a lot then.

What I'm Not Doing Tonight

(What up what up LACMA !)

playlist for LACMA

• Leonard Cohen - A Bunch of Lonesome Heroes
• Beach Boys - Heroes and Villains
• Antony and the Johnsons - Shake the Devil
• Esthero - Superheroes
• Old 97's - Up the Devil's Pay
• Llibertines - Time for Heroes
• Starlight Mints - Seventeen Devils
• Danielson - Propaganda for a Comic Strip
• The Kinks - Superman
• Roxy Music - India
• Tommy Dorsey - Song of India
• Screamin' Jay Hawkins - Little Demon
• Steve Earle - Angle is the Devil
• Blitzen Trapper - Devil's A-go-go
• The Anniversary - Devil on My Side
• Marty Robbins - Devil Woman
• Rufus Wainwright - Evil Angel
• Willie Bobo - Evil Ways
• The Smiths - Handsome Devil
• The Germs - Lexicon Devil
• Helen Shapiro - Little Devil
• Robert Johnson - Me and the Devil Blues
  

Not redacting.

I was only writing this post because, for no reason, I really wanted to use the word "redact." Then I realized it's a totally inappropriate word for this post. Anyways, I am addending (blogger doesn't think this is a word but it is the verb form of addendum, believe me), sadly not redacting, the post entitled " Josh Heller doesn't read my blog, but he'd probably enjoy this truck," in which I wrote "P.S. Kim chi quesedilla! Oh my god." with "P.P.S. Kim chi quesedilla! Stop putting too much cheese in it and letting it get too cold and congealed before you serve it!" (In fact, I exactly did not redact that post; I did not edit it before publishing in such as I am editing it after the fact with this here additional post).

Hey, I don't know what the deal is with this post being all kinds of crazy font sizes. When I edit it, it looks and says it is all one size. Sorry.

Notes taken out of context.

In the process of cleaning my room (the room I spent more than half of my childhood in, the room I just moved back into after not living in for four years a.k.a. there was a lot of stuff just stashed in random places room), I have discovered lots of little pieces of papers, post-its, business cards, what-have-yous with notes on them, either that I noted to myself or received. Sometimes I remember what they mean or what they come from, frequently I don't. I am going to share a few. Feel free to claim you're the one who said any of them. This may become a new series (if I ever resume regular posting), semi-inspired by Erica's affinity for my (is "to" actually the correct word here?) letter series.

"Looks like a 502, he's really weaving." "Give him a ball of yarn; he could make us both a sweater."

"Call him on it, be like, 'that dog just ain't gonna hunt.' Yeah, maybe the idiom is too much, but my point remains." (okay, honestly, I now remember exactly who said this and what/who it was about, but I didn't when I found it and it's kinda too much to get into for a blog post but makes me chuckle and thus I deem it post-worthy).

Perhaps a good way to remember the order of the streets downtown: "Wouldn't it be grand to hope to pick flowers on Figueroa?"

"1848 was charming only through an excess of the ridiculous"

"It is not theft to steal from thieves; it is merely irony."

OK, this last one I wrote down sometime during 2006. I know this because other stuff on the paper happened that year. I also know gkla told/IMed/somethinged this to me, but I have no idea what it is referencing: "Laura, you may now proudly say of yourself, "Today I was riding dirty." So fantastically dated, right?!

A few updates.

Two meals were foiled today, sadly. I was making dukkah-encrusted salmon for the fam (I didn't even know what dukkah was last night and today I was all set to wow them with the beautifully crispy topping) and, after I had made way more than necessary of the mixture, I notice an oddly darker piece. At first, it seemed like just a burned piece of coriander, but then it looked like it had appendages. With the use of a trusty magnifying glass, I was able to see that it, indeed, had legs. Gross! So I had to throw out all the mix. And now I am sufficiently concerned about all our spices--here's to the end of flavor! Thankfully, salmon is just as delicious baked with even a meager dose of salt, pepper, and some dill.

The other meal was ruined not by it's undeliciousness (it was a quite tasty chocolate twist I picked up on the way to work bright and early at 7:30 thi morning), nor did was it bugged. Breakfast was ruined because of the excruciating expedition finding parking at UCLA has become. I admit I got there about eight minutes later than the previous shift, but is that really reason for me to expect all street parking to be gone? Anyways, at that point I knew I was already going to be late to work. I really hate being late. So, already slightly anxious, I drive around campus only to realize they have removed ALL the meters I used to park at for even moderately reasonable fees. They also removed all signage. So, when I resign myself to paying a gazillion dollars at a "pay-by-space" space, I park and go to pay at the new machine things they replaced the meters with. It's only two hour parking; no sign for that, of course. I am already late, so I paid it. But it was SEVEN DOLLARS FOR TWO HOURS.

Having been ten minutes late to work, I had to leave two hours later in the middle of my shift to try to find another space. After looking all over the campus and the neighboring streets for 15 minutes, I park in one of the lots. WHICH IS NOW TEN DOLLARS.

Thus, I paid $17 to park when I was only going to be making $48 dollars today. UCLA parking FOR THE LOSE.

Hippies

I don't remember where I read it, so I apologize for the lack of attribution in advance, but I enjoy this sentence:

I hate war, man, just look at the circumference of my pant legs.

Also, in case you were wondering, the new LA Times site uses the same font I always have on this here blog. Indeed, the LA Times new site kinda looks like a blog.

Dear Netflix,

Thanks for defining my film interests in such specific categories. Yes, I like "feel-good independent comedies," "critically-acclaimed cerebral foreign movies," and "crime movies from the 1940s."

You're so right,
Laura

hello.

I've been wasting a lot of time on the internet today, which is fitting because I took a four day hiatus from the interweb and it was fabulous. Anyways, following is a variety of things 1) I want, 2) I want to read at a later point (but I'm not on my computer so I can't just bookmark them), 3) that are interesting, 4) or whatever.

Items of clothing/stuff I can't afford to purchase: purple sweater blazer, tank top (by the way, why are these called tank tops?), bow tie necklace ('guess this means I will miss being an usher), clogs, bag (in orange).

Listen: Turkish Psych Funk!

Read: Gas station architecture, sea&space

Look: Wu Tang meets Blue Note, Museum of Online Museums

Go?: Fiesta Shalom (name = eeek), MOTA day(although the name would possibly be worse than Fiesta Shalom, I would totally buy 'Arroyo Fro-yo')

LAist used a photo of mine again today: http://laist.com/2009/03/03/today_we_vote_heres_what_you_need_t.php

really Star Trek weekend.

Brent Spiner in Man of La Mancha at Freud on Saturday (didn't recognize him, my dad had to tell me who he was) and Leonard Nimoy in audience at Royce on Sunday (definitely recognized him. Leonard Nimoy!!!)

baby, baby

Dear Tavis Smiley,

Your laugh brings so much joy into my life. Additionally, Lamont Dozier and Raphael Saadiq? What a show!

Danke,
Laura

work woes

Dear girl ten feet away from me,

Yelling that you lost your voice seems a little foolish, doesn't it?

Sincerely,
Laura

chain mail replacement

I'm writing this here and not on Facebook, because I don't want to participate in chain mail and tag 25 people afterwards but also don't want to disappoint the three people who have tagged me who obviously care so much about me (hehe).

1. My mother taught English. This has made me keenly aware of other people's grammar mistakes and super embarrassed when I make them myself. It bothers me that I am quite bothered by other people's mistakes--well, at least some of them. Just so you know, "number" and "amount" are different words. "Few" and "less" are, too. There should always be a comma before "too."

2. I have never desired to be a real banker, but, when I was younger, I had my own pretend bank. I made my own currency, checks, and log books. I printed weekly statements for my family members and allowed them to make transactions. The bank even had an awesome logo and a slogan I can't remember.

3. I have never had a pet. Assorted family member's allergies and aversions prevented it. My grandfather had two cats that my brother and I named. Then one of the cats jumped at my brother and created a huge gash in his neck. That was the end of us hanging out with the cats.

4. I truly enjoy learning. I can usually listen to people to talk about things that interest me for a long time. On the other hand, three hour classes usually only retain my full attention and interest for at most two hours. Additionally, I do not wish to be a writer of any sort and have only two or three times in my life enjoyed written assignments.

5. I did not have cable television until the middle of third grade. While that seems pretty early in life, I think much about me is related to the fact that I pretty much only watched PBS for those formative years. On family trips, Nickelodeon and Nick at Nite were the Coolest Things Ever. Once we got cable, classic television was all I watched until much later. Hogan's Heroes is still my favorite show, closely followed by Adam-12. I have seen every episode of Hogan's Heroes at least three times. I would totally be able to watch the same episode a few times in a row and each each viewing.

6. It is a little weird to me that I love prison movies, but I do. My favorite movie, not just in the prison genre, is Escape from Alcatraz with Clint Eastwood. This is, in large part, the cause of my love of Clint Eastwood, not due to my love of Clint Eastwood. My second favorite is Papillon.

7. I hate washing dishes. It also amazes me how easily I make my apartment incredibly messy, when I am a generally organized person.

8. I do not know how to ride a bike.

9. I have had a fireplace in my apartment both this year and last and never used it until right now (Sunday February 1st, 7:58pm). Unfortunately, it is not a real fire place. The logs are fake. I do not like that. Also, the flames are blue. There is not much heat. The logs will never burn down. The fire will never end, unless I turn it off. What the hell? That is not the correct fire place experience. I don't like the sound it makes or the unsafe feeling it gives me. It also took my building three months to turn it on. Ridiculous.

10. I really like cooking. I would be more than happy to cook you dinner, if you help me clean up after.

11. Ella Fitzgerald once serenaded me in an elevator.

12. This one should be obvious by now: I love the work of Raymond Chandler. For the most part, I also love movies based on the work of Raymond Chandler.

13. I painted a portrait of him recently. It's the first painting I've done in a really long time. This makes my mother really happy, because I used to be very into art. I almost went the whole art school route. But, in the past four years, I haven't done much art at all. My mom thinks I am wasting talent. I think I have the skill but not the ideas.

14. I enjoying drinking gimlets. I am not sure what percent of this affinity stems from my love of Raymond Chandler and the first book of his I read, The Long Goodbye.

15. I bought a harmonica and would like to be able to play it well. I have not yet dedicated any time to this task, however. Hopefully spring break will bring greatness.

16. I am finally going to Coachella this year. I am most excited 'bout Leonard Cohen. Sometimes I call him Lenny Cohen, like we're friends. We're not, but I have met him at a Christmas party. Sorta met him. More like too nervous to say anything other than hello. (OH MY, SO COOL).

17. I frequently think in song titles. When someone says "alley oop" at a basketball game, I first think of the song by the Hollywood Argyles, not the offensive maneuver usually involving a slam dunk.

18. I think James Franco is an okay guy but am really disappointed he is going to be the commencement speaker at my graduation.

19. I don't think participation should be so highly valued by professors. This pressure to participate causes people to say things just for the sake of getting those participation points and not because they have anything valuable to say. I cannot count how many times classes have been ruined because of idiots 'participating.'

20. My usage of the word idiot reminds of an interesting twenty minutes spent in an urban planning class a year or two ago discussing all the words related to city. In a roundabout way, idiot is one of them. See if you can figure out how.

21. I have a headache right now that is distracting.

22. I will watch any Huell Howser show. Even though I am way into them, they frequently are very helpful if I want to be sleeping. I will spend over five bucks (ridiculous) on a quart of Broguiere's milk if Huell Howser's face is on it. In my defense, it does taste better than most other milk I've had.

23. I really like Jewish holidays. I am going to have a seder this year at my apartment on the third night. You might be invited. Let me know if you would like to be.

24. I don't know why I didn't think of this one sooner: I really really really like postcards. I keep every postcard I get. I also, in general, like writing and receiving letters (not just the fake ones I write on this blog).

25. I do a lot of things for the future, which sometimes seems really silly to me but I like it anyways. For example, I took a yearbook photo and am buying a ridiculously expensive yearbook when I graduate, because I am really into my grandmother's college yearbooks and want to have one for my eventual granddaughter to find. This way/philosophy/appropriate-noun-of-which-I-cannot-think-currently has caused me to be quite the pack rat.

Who ya gonna call? Trust Busters!

Dear Television Gods,

How did you let me miss this show? While I have only seen some clips, it seems to be the perfect cartoon for this particular gal. Silly songs about Teddy Roosevelt and other presidents?! How fab! It came out about the time I stopped watching Saturday morning cartoons I assume.





Release this on DVD, please!
Laura

P.S. These magazine covers are really swell.

Vote of Confidence

(10:25:19 PM): i think you would kick the city coucil's ass

(10:25:21 PM): council

(10:25:22 PM): 's

(10:25:26 PM): you should run

(10:25:44 PM): CD5 is an open seat right now if you're interested

(10:25:48 PM): you wouldn't even have to move

yesssss!

bloggity bloggity blog

Dear Peter and Rob,

I like your blog. This post is particularly enjoyable.

Sincerely,
Laura

Removed from sidebar to make room for 2009 list!

Copying Susan Harris: Books I Read, Latter half of 2007

• Adam Gopnik - Paris to the Moon
• Elijah Wald - Escaping the Delta
• Poe Ballantine - Things I Like About America
• Reyner Banham - Los Angeles: The Architecture of Four Ecologies
• Rob Sheffield - Love is a Mix Tape
• The Editors of McSweeney's - Mountain Man Dance Moves: The McSweeney's Book of Lists

Uncharacteristic fashion post.

I put together this nice little image in Paint last night, because I was procrastinating as usual. I want these items of clothing, which would make all sorts of rad outfits together. I will not, however, buy any of these items, because they are all incredibly overpriced.


Pedro Garcia - Alanis jazz shoes
3.1 Phillip Lim - Leather motorcycle jacket
3.1 Phillip Lim - Lace Bubble Skirt
Oscar de la Renta - Crossover Faille Dress
Fendi - striped crepe dress
Jimmy Choo - heather leather boots